Monday, January 14, 2013

Squeaking Under the Wire and Twit Notations

First of all, the good news: I got my blasted funding!

The Financial Aid office put me on Financial Probation, for reasons that currently remain unclear.  So, now I am on Financial Probation and Academic Probation, but I am allowed to borrow money from Uncle Sugar at exorbitant rates to educate myself. 

Had they sent me an email along with the written letter as is customary, I would have had the weekend to prepare.  But since they sent it snail mail only, I got the news Saturday night and quickly arranged to get books and everything else Monday.  Fortunately, my Monday class starts late – otherwise I would be mildly hosed.  Though only mildly – people have started classes without books before.  So, my trek through academia at Wossamotta University continues, at least for the time being.

I will jest about being a neo-luddite from occasionally, but in sooth something like this would be infinitely more difficult to navigate without the Internet.

Secondly, the renaissance sword group I run with, Random Wit and Rapier Twits, had a meeting not long ago, and I took some impromptu minutes.  I’m not going to post anything dealing with Twit business here, obviously – that would be rude.  And any tips here are the kind that Twits everywhere wish more troupes would follow anyway.  But upon reviewing the notes after I posted them, I realized that perhaps I should have edited for more than just typos. 

For what follows, the fault is entirely mine.  We were discussing costuming and garb.  I swear.

Men’s garb: loose shirt with long cuff or bracer.  No Imperial entanglements, please.   

Take a second shirt, in the name of Reason!  Ideally, three: have a back-up in case of tearing.  The underarm rip leads to Nippleman issues (and his faithful side-kick, Teat-Mutt).

Kilts are for Scots or Irish only.  Wrap-around or sewn.  No regimental, please.  Bunnies are fine.  “Mommy, what’s that?”  “Just let me die.”  Represent, man.  Represent.

The codpiece is out of style by Elizabeth, but was the padded bra of Henry’s age.  Disco goldfish.  Paunch noses.  Tickle-me Cookie Monster.  Vast, vast poetic license.  Come now, are we not comedy?

Skirts are long rectangle, or the gourd skirt Triangle Man effect.  Also bum roll.  Not what it sounds like.  Tapestries better for overskirt, heavy flannels are good too, but something with weight is required.  Modern materials are fine so long as it looks good.  But whatever skirt is on your waist, have it on a waist band, not on a drawstring.  I think so, Brain, but burlap chafes me so.

Ladies with bodices require boning, some more than others.  Laces can get almost anywhere.  Stays are also possible.  Bloomers for modesty.

[Character Name]: A ruff.  Muslin?  Something cheap, as always.  White, off-white.  Because there is nothing more pompous than a bird that has swallowed a plate.

Have a belt just for your equipment: it’s all about the thickness.

No capes.  Edna Mole is God.

Gangdam style is definitely Korean, not Japanese.  Apparently this is very important. 

Love sacks are much better than they sound.

For the record, the gaff about Gangdam Style being Japanese was mine – that’s how it ended up in the notes. 

While I do not currently perform with the Twits – that would involve lots of sunshine and crowded lanes – I am there for support.  They are a very fine group, and I think they are bringing something important back to the Ren Fest scene.  And, soon enough, the world will see what that is.

Sometime again,

(Sunrise picture courtesy of; coyote maze pic courtesy of; characters from Bloom County were created by Berke Breathed; the Twits own themselves.  All rights reserved by their rightful owners.  No narwhals were harmed in the making of this blog, but some were exposed to Twilight novels and may still be feeling disoriented and hostile.  In case of narwhal encounter, use your best judgement.)

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